I Can’t Hear What You’re Saying Over the Noise of My Group Identity

by DANNIELLE LARKIN

“I hate Hillary Clinton. She is the devil incarnate.” “I cannot ever imagine myself being friends with someone who voted for Donald Trump.” “Anyone in this city who thinks we don’t already have plenty of water for the future is an idiot.” “I can’t stand all these people from California moving here.” “Mormons are hypocrites.”

If you live in Utah, and spend any time interacting with your neighbors, you’ve certainly heard at least one of these statements; absolute statements that leave no room for discussion or varying opinion. Zero tolerance. What has brought us to this point in time, when we speak so forcefully and angrily about our own opinions and ideas and refuse to allow room for dissenting, or even slightly altered, ideas?

In the ancient Americas, clans, tribes, and group identites performed the duties of today’s cities and towns. To belong to a group was to be connected to community. Access to food, family, love, reproduction, shelter, protection, and knowledge was all dependent upon group association and belonging. Life started and ended amidst that important societal bond.

In the America of today group identity, although no longer requisite for survival, exists in varying forms and its gravitational pull cannot be overestimated. Some examples include families, neighborhoods, clubs, organizations, cities, communities, religions, friend groups, political parties… The big difference between then and now? Lack of interconnection, communication, and tolerance within the system. We use group identities to forcefully and fiercely connote separation, exclusion, closed minded idealism. Our group identities have gone from being our life blood to being the things that so negatively polarize us.

Groups and group identities need not be bad. Our connections to others are vital. It’s the vitriol we could do without. Get rid of the negativity, the forced exclusion, the polarization. Start listening to out-groups. You never know. You might like what they have to say. You might just want to join their group.